Deep emotion vs. depression

I had an epiphany last night. The setting: Hope invited me to watch a movie together, and we don't do that often these days, so I gladly said yes. That means that we chose one title from the over 300 DVD we have on the shelf, and when Hope chooses the title, we generally end up watching a 'chick flick.' OK - so be it. She chose the tear-jerking winner of the century, "PS I Love You."

I had not seen this flick in a year or so - call me lucky guys - so I let myself get into it. And sure enough, it began to move my emotions. I was saddened - and to distract me, I began to look around the room. There on the shelf were the cremated remains of my parents. Hmm. I might have chosen a happier thing to dwell upon, but just at that point in the movie they present the Urn containing the cremains of one of the lead characters. It was fashioned after his guitar case, and it shows up in scene after scene from that point on in the movie. And it dawned on me that I still have my mom's remains sitting in a plastic container from the cremation people. Sort of a brown Tupperware box as it were. I have a nice wooden box for Dad - he worked with wood all his life and I think he would like the fact that it looks like a book sitting on the shelf - but I have wanted to get a matching unit for mom.

So picture the scene - if I look at the movie and tune in to it, I get sad. If I look around the room, I get sad. If I try to lighten the mood by making jokes or funny little statements about anything at all, Hope gives me one of those big sighs which also tends to create a certain type of sadness in me. So to busy my mind in a happier place, I pull out my iPhone and start checking my Ebay items. And what is the first thing I go to look at? Cremation urns. I had to search under several headings, but I finally found a matching box for Mom. Wow - I was getting deep now.

I was so utterly down at that point! And that is the point at which I had the epiphany: emotions can provide us with a rich, deep pallet of color upon which God can have a free hand to paint pain, sorrow, joy, regret, more joy, remembrance, but they do not have to be the backdrop to despair or depression. I can enjoy a sad movie or a deep emotional trip down memory lane and not have it be the open door to depression. God can use every one of our emotions, even anger I'm sure, and if we allow Him to sanctify it, we can watch as He uses it for our good - and perhaps the good of the people around us! Go God!

I was lifted - but the odd thing is: I never left the deep emotional place I was in. Its not as if joy suddenly sprang eternal in my soul. I just had a warm, deep, God moment sitting there in our family room with my wife by my side and the dog at my feet.